30 Wounds
by Roseveare
Summary: From the challenge community on livejournal. UPDATED! Prompt #23 - Bloodstains. LUFFYKO. Luffy plus girl parts. Brain-breaking Gen. 1000 words.
1. Prompt 8 Whipped

Title: 30 Wounds  
Author: roseveare  
RATING: PG-13  
SUMMARY: Prompt #8 - Whipped. Because sometimes Luffy is also full of fail, and he really ought to face consequences for that more often than he does. Gen. 1000 words.  
NOTES: 1000 word-ish ficlets from the 30_wounds lj challenge community prompt table.  


* * *

**8. Whipped**

"He's through here," the under-priest says, subdued. He won't meet Zoro's eyes, turning too quickly to lead the way. "You can take him back now."

"You didn't ask them to go easy." Says it matter-of-fact, because he hadn't thought it a _possible_ promise at the time.

"I... _couldn't_." Anguish in his old voice. They'd made a lot of friends here, before the incident.

"It's fine," Zoro grunts, sketching a dismissive wave. Not their fault. They all know whose fault it is. "He understands he screwed up." And if he hadn't before, he would now.

There are drops of blood on the elaborate tiles that line the corridor floor.

The swordsman doesn't know what he's expecting, but when he's led into the guarded chamber, things are oddly calm. It's airy and light, like the rest of the temple, and nothing like a cell. Luffy is lying on a bench, on his front, looking reasonably alert with his chin rested on one arm, the knuckles of the other in his mouth -- but pensive, not biting down. There's a thin white sheet draped across his back to hide the offensive marks from sight, but it's starting to spot with red.

When he raises his head to Zoro, his eyes are puzzled, pain a distant haze pushed to the back of them. "I thought it wouldn't hurt," he says blankly, "because I'm made of rubber. But it hurt a lot."

Zoro catches a corner of the sheet in his fingers and flips it over. Luffy grimaces and cranes his neck but doesn't flinch or make a sound. There's no need to count the stripes to know there are twenty of them, these people are good as their word. Each one is stark and clear across his captain's back. Whatever they used, they made sure it would mark rubber skin... because they'd know all about that. Their crew have been here enjoying the hospitality of this island all week. Welcomed by these people with open arms.

"Luffy..." Zoro sighs and sinks down by the end of the bench, leaning his arms next to Luffy's. "You're an idiot."

"Don't sit down," the miscreant protests, shifting. "'Cause I'm getting up. I'm gonna get up." He tries, arches his back slightly to gain the leverage to stand, then his mouth widens in silent agony and he slides back down again. "In a minute."

Zoro wraps his fingers in his captain's and holds him like that, forearm to forearm, attention sliding over and choosing to pay no further heed to the marks circling the slightly narrower wrists. And he sits quietly and waits, because the under-priest's still there, still watching, and the temple guards on the door might be the ones who doled out the punishment and they might also be the ones they all got drunk with the day before yesterday, and he doesn't want either himself or Luffy to give too much away.

It's impossible to articulate how unsettling this all is.

A few minutes pass, the silence awkward, until Luffy licks his lips, preparing to try again. "I think..." Gets his knees under him despite the curl of his back. "...That we should go." Slides his legs sideways off the bench, so awkwardly, trying not to show the pain. Plants his feet and wavers onto them, hair falling to shadow his face.

There's a sink in one corner. He crosses to it, mechanical lurching steps, and splashes water on his face. With his painted, crusted back to Zoro, he collects more water in his hands, raising them and drinking in audible gulps for what seems a long time. And when he turns again, his neck is straight. He picks up his shirt from a stool, but doesn't put it on. He's not hiding anything as he crosses to the under-priest, who lingers by the door, and bows his head and shoulders deeply without sparing the criss-crossed wounds. "I'm very sorry."

The priest bows back but says nothing. Zoro grimaces, and half-nods to the man himself as he follows his captain from the room.

He wonders why he follows Luffy at all, sometimes, and this occasion, like so many, has become a demonstration of both sides of the argument.

He gets further excellent view of Luffy's back as he's following it down through the crowds that still linger outside, near the rig on the temple steps, where most of them probably watched what he declined to and, recognising Luffy, they scatter to clear a path. Follows through the leafy avenues of the town, where the familiar faces react with shock, or start to call out to them, or turn away having heard the story in full. Follows, finally, down the grassy path to the bay where the _Going Merry_ waits.

All the way, Luffy's shirt only dangles in his hand. He could easily put it on and hide his back from view. It's not the pain of cloth against torn skin that prevents him.

Finally, they're close enough to see the others. They've prepared for this, Chopper practically dancing on the spot with anxiety, bandages and supplies at his side, everyone else there too, waiting in their concern. The last of their curious or begrudging or apologetic entourage peels off as Nami hails them. The crew's expressions are all still a little shocked at the sight of their captain's dragging steps, even though they knew what was coming. Perhaps they still didn't believe these people meant to go through with it -- or understand that, as civilised, generous, happy and welcoming as the islanders here are, they made their rules to be obeyed.

Zoro turns to Luffy, but he doesn't need to voice the words on the tip of his tongue; "_Next time, damn it, don't eat the temple offerings_." Luffy's there first with his muted, "Sorry, Zoro." And louder for the rest, "Sorry, guys. I was stupid. I really made a mess of things."

"_Luffy_..." Nami begins, and she's the one that anticipates and runs forward to catch him, before Zoro can reach out, before Chopper can switch to heavy point. "Luffy." Her hands are fixed around the back of his slumped neck and below his waist, where the marks of the lash stop. Her legs waver under his weight, but all of the others are moving forward to help. "You _idiot_. Shut up and let us take care of your _back_."

* * *

...29 more to follow...


	2. Prompt 4 Take it Like a Man

RATING: PG-13  
SUMMARY: From the challenge community on livejournal. Prompt #4 - Take it like a man. "You're not quite as strong as you used to be." Luffyko (female Luffy). Gen. 1200 words.  
NOTES: An ironic take on this prompt because I wasn't completely sure how I was meant to interpret it. Fake-spoiler-inspired "Luffyko" is one of two AUs I'll be using with these stories. See "Escape From Impel Down" for the background.

* * *

**4. Take it Like a Man**

--And the ground is suddenly back underneath him as he's slammed face-down into it. That hurts more now than it used to, although it doesn't hurt _much_; it'd hurt more still if he wasn't made of rubber, but Luffy is starting to get seriously _mad_.

He's fighting a _giant rat_ Some stupid rat guy shouldn't be able to push him around like this! And, damn it, if his body would just stop _tripping him up_ and _falling short_ and _working against him_...

The end of the tail's still around his ankle, which means his chin hits the ground again when he tries to scramble away. Can't really blame his body for that one.

_Stupid_...

Before he can dig his fingers into the pink coils, the tail flexes and whips him up, and he's flying through the air again. His back slams into a crumbling stone wall, one of those stone ruins strewn all along the coastline here on this island. It doesn't hurt much, and at least his ankle is free. He slides down the wall, and bouncing up from a heavy landing, manages this time to get out of the way, so that rat-guy's rat-charge, in full animal form now, ends with a heavier impact than planned.

"Take that, stupid mouse!" Luffy shouts, stomping back to his feet. It's not over; his enemy is shaking his head and picking himself up, blurring back into a burly human.

Luffy stands, waiting, ready, glaring fiercely. He jerks his fist and thumps himself in the forehead, hard, once and then again. He has to get a _hold_ of himself, damn it. He is _not_ going to break out Gear Second or Third against a _giant rat_. Tail or no, this guy isn't Lucci. He's not even any of Lucci's friends. Even if he is a pirate captain who's taken his crew of thugs almost half the length of the Grand Line, this guy is just a _greedy, ambitious jerk_ who got _lucky_. Less than a month ago, Luffy could've beat this guy in his _sleep_. The clawed marks across his arms and belly and the bite in his knee tell their tale of his difficulty now.

He raises his fists and they're shaking -- and it's not because he's afraid of the stupid, small-time brute he's fighting. It's the blows he's missed because his arms are shorter (not _much_, but a _little bit_ shorter, and the difference of a few feet when they're stretched). It's the blows that didn't do the damage he expected because he's a _little_ bit lighter. And it's the blows that never came close to landing because his body mass isn't balanced the same way it used to be, and his co-ordination sucks.

When rat-guy's face stretches into a grin more like a leer and he says, "You're tougher than you look," with that sly, slimy edge, the shaking turns to _rage_ because he's so, so tired of assholes who say things like that.

"You're uglier than you look, rat-bastard," he growls back, and it turns into a roar as he charges, whipping his arms back and springing them forward again to deliver a bazooka punch that, this time, _does_ land.

Except he's still not quite on balance, and can't dodge the tail that curls around his waist, so he gets dragged along when rat-guy crashes back, landing on top of the big man in a sprawl. "If there's a treasure on this island, it's belongs to _me_," Ratty growls. "Not some pansy crew willing to be led by a captain like _you_." Luffy struggles as beefy arms try to grapple, and clamps his hands around wrists he can barely span halfway, forcing them outwards. He butts forward, _hard_, with his head. The _smack_ as his forehead crushes the other man's nose is loud. Close quarters is easier, he's still _almost_ as strong, after all. It just has its other risks. He head butts again and the wrists in his grip go limp. He releases them and hauls back to bury a punch in rat-guy's face.

--_Yells_ as the suddenly sharp teeth in the suddenly huge hairy maw close on half his arm; brings around his other fist hard and fast to make the teeth let go. "_Bastard!_" He's fighting slippy, greasy fur that he can't get any purchase on. Claws rip the front of his shirt and gouge four deep, red lines across the soft flesh of his chest. "Why, you--"

He reaches out with his bleeding arm, snaps stretching rubber fingers to coil around the hairy snout and seal closed the sharp jaw. He kicks upwards a stretching leg -- and it's a blow he uses to bring down buildings, so it should do to bring down a guy like this. His other hand is locked with one hairy paw, and there's nothing he can do about the claws that desperately shred his back until his rising, stretching foot reaches its limit and makes its descent.

Beneath, the ground cracks. Ratty coughs up a spray of blood. Luffy drags free and staggers and drips onto the sandy dirt, light-headed with blood loss. There's barely more than rags left of his shirt, two scraps hanging over each shoulder. He pants heavily for breath as rat-guy, glazed-eyed, lurches upright again as well.

Luffy sees red as he finds the focus of his enemy's eyes isn't really in the fight anymore.

He growls, and flings his hand back in his pistol punch, leaning out and pushing his centre of gravity to get the arm to fully extend. He glares at rat-guy, at the trance-like quality of his gaze, and as his fist reaches its limit and snaps into reverse, he yells furiously, "STOP... _STARING_... AT MY... _CHEST!_"

Ratty doesn't even try to avoid the blow, his eyes don't so much as blink... and as he keels over backwards like a discarded, flea-bitten toy, it's yet another fight that Luffy can't say he won on the merits of his _fighting_.

His arm jerks back to its usual length with a pop. He hisses as the stretched wounds shift, too many marks of teeth and claws. He looks down at his chest and baring his teeth at the sight, hunches and folds his arms across them, trying to to at least partially hide the bouncy mounds of flesh that he's still not used to. Then he trudges off through the ruins to find Zoro.

Zoro, when found, has a few scratches but looks mostly bored. He seems to have dealt with his opponent without any problem. He takes one look at Luffy and does that "GYAH!" thing that's becoming so familiar; drags his t-shirt off, pounces and bundles it desperately over Luffy's head.

A few minutes later, when the swordsman's got his nosebleed stopped and his skin colour's returned to normal, Zoro looks him over again, and winces for other reasons. "_Shit_. Luffy... you need to stop doing this. Damn it, look at yourself. You're a _mess_. You have to start remembering... you're not quite as strong as you used to be anymore."

Luffy freezes.

He slowly raises his eyes. He _stares_ at Zoro. He says, very quietly, very low, "_Shut up_."

He doesn't know what Zoro sees in him right then, or what causes the misty distance and faint shock that passes behind his eyes, but the swordsman doesn't say another word on it. Not then, and not ever.

* * *

28 more to follow...


	3. Prompt 6 Die For You

RATING: PG-13  
SUMMARY: From the challenge community on livejournal. Prompt #6 - Die For You. Knight Sir Crocodile & Squire Luffy AU setting. Because I'm insane. Gen-ish with light Luffy/Robin/Crocodile love triangle hints. 1000 words.  
NOTES: Sir Crocodile as a knight with Luffy as his squire is the other AU that some of these stories will be set in. I've not really worked out all the background for this AU, but it's something like this - 2 hostile neighbouring fantasy kingdoms, one populated with pirate characters and the other marines, regardless of other affiliations (which allows for various infighting), Robin is possibly some kind of ambassador or spy that Sir Crocodile and Luffy are to protect, and it'll probably go from a love triangle into a threesome... if I ever properly write it. This one mostly happened because I didn't want to write the angsty cliche so I bring on the crazy AU to mangle it.  
NOTES 2: I will note in header if fic is an AU. :)  


* * *

**6. Die For You**

"I'm... a brave knight," Luffy grunted, determinedly ignoring the hitch in his voice as something caught in his shoulder, and the snort from the man whose life he'd just saved. Stupid brigands, taking them by surprise. They hadn't looked like Captain Smoker's men at all -- just the sort of common robbers that infested the forests.

"You're a very stupid squire," Sir Crocodile corrected, leaning over him and fumbling with hand and hook to get at the wound around the torn tunic and the pinning arrow. Finally he gave in, and with another snort of disgust, used his sand spell, dexterous fingers of sand accomplishing the task that foxed his lack of two whole hands, working carefully around the wet blood.

"Like hell!" Luffy jerked, but was kept from bolting up by the elbow that jammed into his uninjured shoulder. He stilled obediently, because from long familiarity with Sir Crocodile's temperament, he knew he was lucky that he _had_ gone for the uninjured side. "I saved your life! I might have _died_ for you."

"If you had," the older man said, dismissing the charm and returning his arm to flesh, "You would have been doing your job. Which I suppose is remarkable enough to be especially commendable from you. But you did not save my life. I would have simply used my sand, and the arrow would have done no damage. Unlike upon the flesh of _certain rubber imbeciles_."

"You're... fulla crap," Luffy mumbled, feeling consciousness sliding a little. The green canopy of the tree branches above spun and blurred. "I know you didn't see that coming... You jus' can' admit... I saved your life... Agh!" Pain flared as Crocodile briskly sat him up and bent his body forward, chest over knees. The larger, single hand picked up his and dropped it onto the protruding head of the arrow, where it had just snagged his side beneath his right shoulder, punching through shallowly between two ribs.

"Hold that. Tightly."

Luffy clenched his fingers and winced, squeezing shut his eyes, as Sir Crocodile snapped off the end of the arrow behind him. Then, that large hand closed over his own again, and drew the remaining length of the shaft from the wound. Luffy slid bonelessly sideways and his vision blurred on the knight, crouched over him scowling at the barbed point.

When he drifted back to consciousness, there were two voices talking distantly. One of them, female, made him feel better just hearing its smooth tones. Luffy lifted a hand to his face, hiding his smile behind it, since he knew it would annoy the _other_ voice present, as he blinked to unglue his eyelids.

There was still an awful lot of pain. But there was a constriction on his shoulder that told him the wound had been taken care of, which reassured him that he wasn't going to die -- Sir Crocodile wouldn't have gone to the effort of bandaging if he thought the exercise useless. It was almost night, and he could hear the crackling of a campfire. He was lying on his back in the grass, half his clothes cut off. It seemed the knight had tossed a blanket over him and set up camp around his prone form.

"Is Lady Robin okay?" Luffy asked hoarsely, remembering dimly that she had been absent, earlier.

"Why, I'm just fine, Sir Squire," her mellow voice responded. "Thank you for asking."

"She had to catch the horses," Croc snapped. "Since a damn fool squire put himself out of commission."

"Sorry," Luffy said meekly.

"I didn't mind so very much." He took a sharp intake of breath, then forgot to breathe at all as the Lady knelt beside him, demurely holding her trailing skirts out of the dirt. "Do you want to sit up, Luffy?" She didn't wait for his reply before offering a shoulder. Sitting up hurt, but the offered shoulder made many things better. "Do you need anything?"

"Meat! ...Please, m'lady."

Crocodile snorted. "Don't coddle the boy, or next time he'll just do it to get out of his duties. Unless you enjoy seeing a full Knight cook and groom, m'lady." He paused a moment, a pause heavy with suspicion. Possible, actually, that the accusation might be true, for _this_ lady.

She gave her bright, brittle little laugh. "What a shocking thing to say, Sir Crocodile." She plucked a roasting bird from the fire to pass along to Luffy's hand. Crocodile eyed them without much joy, sword wedged between hook-wrist and knee while he polished the blade. Maybe Crocodile was wishing himself the one injured.

"You should be kinder to the boy," the Lady berated. "He _did_ almost die for you today, thereby doing us both a service, my Knight."

"That's his _job_, and I was in _no danger_."

She tipped her head on one side and patted Luffy's arm with an exaggerated sigh. "My poor wounded escort. It seems there is no pity in this man at all."

"I'd rather," Luffy said, squirming to sit more upright and not lean on her quite so much, "almost die for _you_ -- any day, m'lady."

"That's very sweet, Luffy... and delivered with such a direct, innocent charm. If I may ask only -- please, resist the compulsion to go looking for opportunities to do so right away." She smiled at him wryly, awakening little cynical creases around her eyes, but nonetheless a smile of such intensity he grew kind of over-aware that she was smiling at him and he was half-naked under a sheet. He disengaged, lurching to one knee. "Oh...! Be careful, there... careful..." She caught his arm as he almost went over, and though he'd _intended_ to do it without help, she aided him on the arduous journey to his feet.

Luffy felt his face burning as he thanked her, tugged the slipped sheet around himself again, and stumbled to raid his pack for a shirt that wasn't in pieces.

"If you're up," Sir Crocodile grunted. "You can finish getting the tangles from Alabasta's mane, I think she's got half a hawthorn bush taking root in there -- and wave the brush in the vicinity of that nag Merry of yours, if it doesn't bolt all over again from the mere sight."

"Too cruel," Lady Robin was quick to scold.

Sir Crocodile eyed her at dour length.

"I suppose," he said, "that's _my_ charm."

* * *

27 more to follow... 


	4. Prompt 23 Bloodstains

RATING: PG-13 I guess if you're delicate?  
SUMMARY: From the challenge community on livejournal. Prompt #23 - Bloodstains. LUFFYKO. Luffy + girl parts. Brain-breaking Gen. 1000 words.  
Notes 1: AHAHAHAHA. I am fully aware that for this I should be shot. Enjoy.  
Notes 2: Luffyko AU!

* * *

**23. Bloodstains**

The second day the bleeding wouldn't stop, Luffy huffed and grumpily went to see Chopper.

"Chopper! I've a mystery wound!" he said. With less of a spring in his movements than usual, he perched himself on the edge of the exam table and starting to unfasten his shorts. "I don't know how I did it, and it won't stop bleeding, so I figured I better see you." He contorted to tug one leg out of his shorts, leaving them to dangle around his other ankle. He started to pull down the little yellow panties Nami had made him start wearing, blood-spotted tissues peeping out the front.

"I think I must've sat on something sharp," Luffy added plaintively, "And it must be deep, 'cause my stomach really hurts, right up here..." He didn't even get chance to point -- squawked in surprise as Chopper grabbed his hand and dragged his underwear back up. Then with a terrified wail, the doctor scurried beneath a table, where he started to whimper.

"Chopper!" Luffy yelped, not in the mood to coax the doctor out of one of his attacks of timidity, even if he'd already known he wasn't taking the idea of the changes wrought by Iva's powers too well. "So it's in _that_ part! But you gotta take a look! You're the only doctor here! It won't stop bleeding. That's _bad_, right?"

Shorts in one hand, he slid from his perch and bent down, but all he could see under the table was a quivering ball of fur pressing itself back into the furthest dark corner... and honestly, he felt _lousy_ and his stomach was all one big painful _grumble_ and his head felt full of _socks_, so he really wasn't going to go crawling under there to pull Chopper out.

"Fine." Luffy turned to leave and irritably kicked a stray ball of tissue with his bare foot. "Guess I'll go ask Zoro to help me 'til you feel like being a _real_ doctor..." Zoro knew plenty about wounds, and even if girl-parts caused him to make that "gyah!" face, _he'd_ still look at it...

"N-n-n-n-n-not Zoro..." Chopper stammered, a wavering little noise that Luffy only just caught as he was about to go out the infirmary door. "N-n-n-n-Nami! Ask... n-n-Nami!"

"Huh?" Luffy blinked. Then, he supposed that made sense, because Nami knew something about wounds too, and she certainly shouldn't hide under any furniture if he asked her to look at girl-parts -- although she did tend to get mad whenever he showed his to any of the guys, so maybe it was wise to go to Nami instead of Zoro.

"Okay. Then I'll ask _Nami_."

He still slammed the door as he left the room. He heard it fall off its hinges and hit the floor behind him.

* * *

"...and Chopper hid under a table and won't look at it 'cause it's in a _girl place_, so can you do it, Nami, _pleeeeaaase_...?" He moaned and hunched over his complaining stomach.

"That doesn't sound very much like Chopper." Nami eyed him from the deck chair. She had that Look. The Look that said he was breaking Female Rules of some sort. He followed her gaze down and realised his shorts were still in his hand.

"Uh..." He swallowed. "_Pleeeaase_, Nami," he said again, a bit desperately, since he now had the feeling not only wasn't he going to get help, but he was going to get hit with something as well (although it was true that Nami hit him less now he was a girl, but there were certain offences that seemed non-negotiable). "It won't stop bleeding and it _hurts_, and Chopper's no good at _all_-- ughup--" He stopped and swallowed again, because that funny noise he'd just made had sounded disturbingly like...

Luffy scrubbed at his eyes frantically. No way! After all the times he'd been hurt ten times worse before, he wasn't crying now over some stupid wound! Thankfully, his annoyance drove the beginnings of tears quickly dry. He felt his face burn as Nami stared at him open-mouthed. Damn! She'd noticed!

"..._Oh_," Nami said, her expression weird. "Yes, Luffy. All right. You have to come to the girl's cabin so we can talk about this _somewhere not here_, but I'm sure I can help you."

With that, she leaped up and bundled him ahead of her urgently, moving rather faster than Luffy's legs wanted to go at the moment, away from Sanji's twirling appearance on deck with treats for his 'three favourite laaaadiiiiies!' Dizzying seconds later, he was in the girl's cabin watching a growing pile of ominous feminine artefacts land upon the bed as Nami ransacked her belongings.

The uses of such items, Luffy had never dared ponder, having glimpsed them only on occasion. They were Things, he dimly knew, that struck fear into the hearts of men, and even though now he was really a girl too -- if one determinedly clinging onto his right to sleep in the men's cabin and trying to ignore Sanji unless food was involved and really _really_ trying to act as if nothing had changed because he had the feeling that thinking too much on this would leave him jibbering in a corner... so it was ever so lucky he was good at not thinking -- anyway, he was pretty sure the effect was still working on him. His legs trembled helplessly.

"So," Nami said, flinging one last bright square little parcel down next to a tube shaped one. Then she launched off into... _many, many words_. Words which Luffy recognised instantly as Important, so tipped his head on one side to listen and nodded sensibly at each pause. By the time she had finished it was all remarkably clear and he was already feeling much better. Excited and pumped-up now that he'd been inducted into forbidden female knowledge, he exclaimed--

"AH! So it's a mystery wound, then, Nami!"

For some reason, Nami sagged and turned around to start beating her forehead against the wall. Luffy watched and fidgeted until she stopped and straightened up again.

"Luffy." Her mouth fixed in a long, grim line, expression firm and serious. She raised her finger emphatically. "You are absolutely right. It is a mysterious... Mystery Wound. It affects all women every month. You must make sure that you take care of it with these special..." Her voice faded and cracked as though she was having problems shaping the words. "These special..."

"Mystery bandages?" Luffy burst in excitedly. "That's it, isn't it Nami? That's right! That's what they are!"

"...Yes, Luffy."

The look developing on her face was beginning to remind him _distinctly_ of Chopper just before he'd hid under the table. Luffy opted to scrape up an armful of the bright packets and beat a swift exit.

* * *

26 more...? 


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